Waiting...

I sit, waiting for Shelly to finish with the 1st part of her IVF Procedure. Yes, we've decided to do it. IVF. In Vitro Fertilization. Routine now a days, but 20 or so years ago, a brand new science. We've been trying for some time now. 2 1/2 years or so without luck. Yes we've done the pills, the Doctors...Nothing. We decided to try again and not hold anything back.

Today's the day. I sit, thankful for the life I have been given...For the beautiful woman with which I have been privileged to share life. Even now, I find it difficult to write. I guess I'm rather nervous. I find that my brain tends to work through the issues that arise, but only when it's an inappropriate time to do so. It doesn't absorb the magnitude of the situation until later. Even now as I sit, I am literally feeling lightheaded.

I think about our Daughter who didn't want to let me go this morning. I know she probably sensed we were going somewhere important. She's intuitive in that way.

To think that God might bless us with another child is hard to fathom. The procedure might not work and we are ready for that. However, it just might work as well. Are we ready for that? I thank God for walking with us through this Journey. We haven't been easy to deal with I know that.

I talk with others when difficulties arise and I pray for them. I oftentimes don't pray for myself. I'm not sure why, but today, my prayer is that God's will be done. My prayer is that our children will grow in the light, love and knowledge of God through Jesus Christ. I pray that they will be full of the love of God toward others and that Shelly and I have a part in bringing them life and light to the world.

But for now...I wait...With a light head and a bit of hope. Hope that God is paying attention. Hope that his grace is sufficient...Hope that Shelly's okay...Hope that it just might be a girl...Or a boy...Or, with the odds...Maybe both...