Wandering

Have you ever been somewhere so unfamiliar that you acted as if you knew exactly where you were in order not to draw attention to yourself? Probably happens all the time huh? I find myself in situations - locations where I feel completely out of place, but instead of feeling uncomfortable, I simply pretend to be at home. It's my defense mechanism.

What I find interesting about the main character's beginning journey is that he is surrounded by people who don't seem to be so concerned about the fact that they are all headed for a destination that is completely unfamiliar. They all seem to have it all together. They all seem to know exactly where they are going when in reality, not one person has a clue. They don't even seem to be enjoying the ride. They all tell their stories, and cry about how they've been put upon and mistreated and maligned. They share their plans to revolutionize the barren city below. Conversation seems intelligent, but beneath it all lies complete insecurity.

When it comes right down to it, none of us really know what's going on in life. A child dies, a mother disappears, one trusted friend rejects another, sickness creeps in. Some people walk around like they understand what's going on. Truth is, their just as lost as the rest of us, or they're wandering like the rest of us. Some of us aren't so lost as much as we are wandering. Tolkien said (roughly), "not all who wander are lost." Most of us wander. Some might have a better sense of the way than others, but for the most part, we're all trying to make it the best way we know how. I think for me, I'll just admit that I have got little clue as to why or what is about to happen, but I'll try my best to enjoy the journey.

Twilight

C.S. Lewis has a distinct way of describing things. His descriptions of the town at twilight are familiar one moment and ghostly the next. It's the town where his hero, if you could call him that, he's more of a voyeur...a traveller through this story, finds himself. Because the town is empty, he naturally gravitates to the only crowd he sees - the ones waiting at a bus stop.

The people are normal - a bit edgy and irritated. Kind of like church on occasion. But as the author points out, these are people who seem to know the answers. They seem to think they have it right, even though they mysteriously find themselves in the middle of an abandoned town during eternal twilight alongside a motley crew of fairly odd people. Still, through their conversation and attempt at order, each considers their socially constructed view of life as the social norm ...again, kind of like church on occasion.

What struck me as interesting is how the people in line waiting for something to happen pass their time through conflict and grumbling. It is unclear to everyone why they wait, but they await in their natural state. Here at this bus stop, no one can hide their true self. It will become evident eventually. Some stay, most leave, but the beginning of the journey begins at this all too familiar, but not so exciting place.

I find that I have admiration for these people - even for those rude self-centered ones present. Admiration for their bravery in attempting the journey. Something inside them seeks - longs for the trip until they find themselves at the crossroads of decision. For the most part, they've arrived at a place without really understanding why. It could be that the deep seeded longing to go home takes over the mind's perception of reality. Whatever the case, we as a people are drawn to the life changing decision. Unfortunately, we usually arrive with people who annoy us. We must be confronted with this decision alongside others who are in the same situation and how we react to each other will affect that decision in a particular manner. How will we be? Who will we find ourselves alongside? Will we be so consumed that we fail to notice each other? Or will we endure each other without disturbing the peace? Funny thing is...this still sounds a lot like church.

The Great Divorce - the Process

C.S. Lewis in his book The Great Divorce discusses the afterlife with a rather unique perspective. he presents the idea that "I do not think that all who choose wrong roads perish; but their rescue consists in being put back on the right road....Evil can be undone, but it cannot 'develop' into good. Time does not heal it."

The book talks about the journey of those who have passed from this life into the next. Now, the former fundamentalist side in me screams that the point of salvation is to rest forever in heaven with God so that we don't perish in everlasting torment. After all hell is reserved for those who clearly deserve it and those who just didn't get a chance to hear about Jesus. But the point of salvation rested in the 'transaction' of the recieving. I heard and used the prototypical evangelical question. "If you died tonight, do you know if you'd spend eternity with God?" Or I asked, "if you were standing in front of the pearly gates and God asked you why He should let you into His heaven, what would your answer be?"

These questions scared me. And when I used them on others it scared them too...well, the ones who actually cared about being saved. The ones who blew me off were probably destined for torment, so it was their fault for not being scared.

Now, the current me has changed a bit since then. I've grown to learn that salvation is more a journey of relationship rather than a 1 time obeying of the Gospel. I hear that...they 'obeyed the gospel.' Well, good. Are they still obeying it or was it just that once? In 1 Corinthians 1:18, Paul uses the term 'we are being saved.' He also brings up in 2 Corinthians 2:15. This statement was very intriguing to me because I never thought of it as a process. I dealt with absolutes. Right or wrong...no gray areas. But the idea of the grace that this statement presents is very comforting.

I've grown to learn that salvation is a growing process...a relational process. It is not programmatic nor is it committee based. Evangelism doesn't have to be scary. Unless you don't like people...then it might be scary. But more on evangelism later.

C.S. Lewis presents people as completely imperfect. Not in control. The struggle still present after death with those who have found themselves on the frontiers of heaven. How we hold onto things and think for a moment that we know better. In upcoming blogs I'll be talking about certain characters that are revealed and how I find a bit of myself in most all of them.

I'd love to hear your comments...